Wednesday, January 6, 2016
2015: oh... Gone daddy gone....
The year started with neurosurgery - my first MVD- and beginning a year long recovery. For those of you who don't know, MVD stands for micro vascular decompression. The surgeon cuts a substantial hole in the skull (a craniotomy) and removes the bone. From there he unwraps the trigeminal nerve from the brain stem and sees where the damage has occurred in any of the five branches of the nerve in the face. I had damage in three but most substantial was an artery had wrapped itself around the trigeminal nerve and had cut off almost all of the blood supply. (The same thing had began on the other side of my face - you'll read about this in a moment.) My surgeon was surprised I hadn't had an aneurysm.
April brought sunshine, snow melting, beautiful weather and an emergency hernia repair.
September. The end of a great summer break for the kids. I love love love having them home and it's sad when they go back. They had a supreme vacation with their family but I did not join them. I was in far too much pain and just.... Couldn't. It broke my heart.
So I missed their first day of school as I was having my second MVD (micro vascular decompression) on the other side of my face. I contracted several infections and was extremely sick after surgery. One of my closest friends took a BUS up from Arkansas and left her child and hubby behind to care for me and my family for THREE WEEKS!! I cannot express the gratitude in my heart for that act of selfless love.
Thus, begins my year long recovery with that MVD. We are in January now and I did not have a decent level of success with this last surgery. But it's all good. Trigeminal neuralgia is like that. It does what it wants. Surgery is not a guarantee but it did save my life, twice, even if pain wasn't improved the second time around.
I have finally begun to accept that. I have no power or control over what this disease does in my life. Just like my tumor. But I do know that I received some very good advice from a friend who suffers far greater than I. He said, "no matter what, do one thing a day." Today I've done seven so far and counting. It still looks like Christmas vomited in my living room but again I've had to try to accept that with chronic illness, those things aren't important. Eventually things get tossed, put away in their place. And I feel like a million bucks because although I'm in bed with horrific pain after, I did it!
Isn't she gorgeous? I'm not a new agey kinda person but wow. This sculpture really rocks my world.
It's January 2016 and I'm reconnecting with old friends. I'm anxious about what my life will bring this spring.
Here is to a healthy, happy, fun, outrageous, exciting, blessed new year for us all!
still searching .....